By Tanni Haas, Ph.D. | Contributor
While death is an inevitable aspect of life, discussing it with children can be particularly daunting for parents. Below are some recommended books that can facilitate these important conversations about mortality with toddlers, young children, tweens, and teenagers.
For Toddlers (Ages 2-4)
Something Very Sad Happened by Bonnie Zucker. Publisher: Magination Press.
For toddlers grappling with the concept of death, Something Very Sad Happened offers a gentle introduction. Bonnie Zucker effectively communicates the meaning of death in a way that resonates with young minds, conveying feelings associated with loss. The narrative reassures toddlers that it’s completely normal to feel sorrow and cry when faced with the absence of someone they loved. Notable words within the text are highlighted in red, allowing parents to personalize the story by incorporating names and pronouns of family members who may have died. Additionally, the book concludes with informative guidance for parents on discussing death with their children, addressing common questions, providing tips for attending funerals and cemetery visits, and suggestions for honoring lost loved ones. Dr. Bonnie Zucker, a psychologist, has authored many works pertaining to children and their developmental needs.
For Young Kids (Ages 5-8)
I Miss You, by Pat Thomas. Publisher: Turtleback Books.
This poetic book is tailored for a slightly older audience and adeptly sheds light on the processes of loss and grief. Through straightforward language, it discusses the physiological changes when a person dies (how bodily functions cease) and explores various causes of death such as illness, accidents, and aging. Pat Thomas, a psychotherapist specializing in child development, authors this part of the 40-volume A First Look At series, which covers various mental health topics like honesty, bullying, and conflict resolution, all aimed at young readers.
For Tweens (Ages 9-12)
How I Feel, by Mia Rolden. Publisher: Callisto Kids.
Tweens, who typically grasp the concept of death, can greatly benefit from resources that assist them in navigating grief. How I Feel serves as a guided journal designed specifically for tweens, providing writing prompts that promote reflection on their feelings of loss. The journal is organized into three main sections: “Explore Your Feelings,” “Create Comfort,” and “Find Peace,” encouraging tweens to contemplate the sources of their grief, identify supportive individuals, and discover comforting spaces. Mia Roldan, a seasoned mental health counselor with extensive experience in aiding children and families through bereavement, has penned several works addressing mental health issues.
For Teens (Ages 13 and Up)
Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens, by Alan Wolfelt. Publisher: Companion Press.
Similar to How I Feel, this book provides writing prompts and valuable insights directed at a teen audience. It encompasses 100 actionable tips and enlightening facts about death and grieving, inviting readers to connect these lessons to their personal experiences. Topics covered include differentiating grief (internal emotions) from mourning (external expressions) and outlining the stages of mourning—acknowledging the loss, experiencing the associated pain, cherishing memories of the deceased, and seeking support from others. Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a prominent grief counselor and educator and the founder of the Center for Loss & Life Transition, authored this book, part of the Healing Your Grieving Heart series.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Tanni Haas, Ph.D., is a Professor in the Department of Communication Arts, Sciences, and Disorders at The City University of New York – Brooklyn College.
