By Children and Screens: Institute of Digital Media and Child Development | Contributor
Amid the surge in social media engagement among adolescents, accelerated by the COVID-19 pandemic, it becomes essential for families to closely monitor how their children interact on these platforms. Understanding the nature of their influences and interactions is key to ensuring healthy family dynamics regarding technology use. By effectively managing social media experiences, we can enhance the social and emotional development of young individuals while steering clear of potential issues like anxiety, depression, and addiction. To assist families in fostering positive relationships both online and offline, Children and Screens: Institute of Digital Media and Child Development has gathered insights from distinguished experts across parenting, education, child psychology, and psychiatry, providing a comprehensive list of ten practical recommendations.
ENSURE SUPERVISION
Studies indicate that social media applications dominate the usage trends among teens and young adults, often becoming their first point of access when they unlock their devices. In response, I propose the following guidelines: (1) Social media access should be restricted for children under 13 to situations where a parent is co-viewing; (2) Preteens should be limited to an hour of usage per day under parental supervision until parents feel assured of their behavior [NOTE: Having the preteen use a parent’s device may initially help monitor behavior]; (3) Teenagers may use social media for 1 to 3 hours daily with specific time restrictions (e.g., not close to bedtime) while parents supervise until they are confident in their child’s safe usage. Regardless of age, conducting weekly reviews of social media sites with children and discussing any negative behaviors is crucial. – Larry D. Rosen, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus of Psychology at California State University, Dominguez Hills and author of several books on technology psychology, including co-author of The Distracted Mind: Ancient Brains in a High-Tech World.
BE PRESENT
Parents play a crucial role in modeling healthy screen habits. Avoid distractions right after work—prioritize conversations with your children before returning to electronic devices. Mornings are an excellent opportunity to engage with your kids before they start their day. Disconnecting during these small moments can greatly strengthen the parent-child relationship. – Dr. Catherine Steiner-Adair, Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, Cambridge MA
LEAD BY EXAMPLE
Adults can also fall prey to digital distractions and oversharing on social media. Teens are observant and can be impacted by how we behave. Research shows that teenagers voice frustrations about parents who seem distracted by their phones or share their lives online without consent. It’s crucial for adults to avoid damaging their credibility by blaming technology for all teen challenges. As mentors, we need to critically reflect on our own digital habits and values visible to younger individuals. – Emily Weinstein, Ed.D., and Carrie James, Ph.D., researchers at Harvard Project Zero currently overseeing the Digital Dilemmas project, an exploration of how tweens, teens, and adults navigate online challenges.
BE YOUR CHILD’S ALLY
Seeing your child engrossed in screens can spark significant frustration for parents, often leading to disputes over “screen time.” Instead of fighting, consider becoming your child’s ally. They need a supportive adult as they face digital challenges. Contrary to expectations, kids can be eager to share their online interests if approached with curiosity rather than judgment. By fostering a non-defensive environment, children are more likely to open up about their online experiences. Methods for becoming an ally include asking open-ended questions about their digital content, engaging in video games together, following them on social media, and ensuring they feel safe discussing any mistakes. This supportive stance encourages them to seek help when facing online dilemmas. – Julia A.G. Storm, MA, Digital Media Wellness Educator and founder of ReConnect, dedicated to promoting smart and balanced media use among families.
FOSTER CONNECTIONS, NOT JUST SCROLLING
Not all social media engagement is equally beneficial. Engaging in direct communication through text or DMs allows for meaningful interactions. Such exchanges promote connections, whereas passive browsing does not. Previous findings indicate that constantly worrying about peers and seeking validation can lead to digital stress. Encouraging mindful and purposeful interactions on mobile platforms can help alleviate these pressures. – Professor Jeffrey Hall, Director of the Relationships and Technology Lab, and Professor Ric Steele, Director of the Clinical Child Psychology Program, University of Kansas.
ESTABLISH CLEAR BOUNDARIES
Designate tech-free times and zones within the home to encourage meaningful family interactions. Discuss and formulate a family agreement regarding responsible media usage, ensuring all members, including parents, participate equally. The journey to and from school can also serve as significant opportunities for connections, free of devices. Such practices not only serve as a healthy counterbalance in a tech-dominated environment but also strengthen familial bonds and ensure kids feel secure. When children turn to the internet for answers, they may encounter information mismatched with your family values, underlining the need for parental presence. – Dr. Catherine Steiner-Adair, Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, Cambridge MA
SMALL STEPS CAN YIELD BIG IMPACTS
Many parents feel overwhelmed when trying to juggle promoting healthy social media use while protecting their children from online risks. Yet, minor adjustments can lead to substantial benefits. Consider simple actions like restricting social media usage before bedtime, fostering discussions about online interactions, and modeling healthy digital practices. Encouraging discussions about social media experiences and the associated emotions can create an environment of openness, enabling your children to navigate their online experiences with support. – Sarah E. Domoff, PhD, licensed psychologist, Associate Professor of Psychology at Central Michigan University, and Research Faculty Affiliate at the University of Michigan.
UNPLUG WHEN NECESSARY
In an age where screens are in constant use for relaxation, it’s vital to recognize that digital devices are tools that can be misused. Just like there are appropriate ages for drinking or driving, similar developmental factors apply to screen usage. It’s crucial to establish guidelines based on age-appropriate media consumption. Encourage your children to also engage in offline activities that spike interest or connect them with family, whether through music, sports, books, or even socially distanced gatherings. – Gwenn Schurgin O’Keeffe, MD, JD, CEO of Pediatrics Now, a consulting organization focused on digital health and youth wellness.
STRIVE FOR BALANCE
Adolescents are increasingly facing mental health challenges, necessitating a balanced approach to their social media use. For teens dealing with depression or anxiety, it’s vital to leverage the positive potential of digital connections while minimizing its adverse effects. Engage in meaningful conversations about how social media impacts their mood and establish structured limits that promote mental health. Foster a supportive environment where your child feels comfortable discussing their digital experiences and emotions. – Jacqueline Nesi, Ph.D., Postdoctoral Fellow at Brown University; Jessica L. Hamilton, Ph.D., Postdoctoral Scholar at the University of Pittsburgh; and Sophia Choukas-Bradley, Ph.D., Assistant Professor at the University of Delaware.
PROMOTE FACE-TO-FACE INTERACTIONS
While teens have adapted to digital communication, direct, personal interactions are irreplaceable. Encourage your teens to prioritize in-person conversations, which are critical for developing social skills—skills that may be diminished by online interactions. It’s crucial for parents to motivate their teens to engage with peers in real life, while still adhering to safe health practices during ongoing challenges. – Dr. Catherine Steiner-Adair, Clinical and Consulting Psychologist, Cambridge MA
With mindfulness and moderation, social media can serve as a valuable platform for connecting friends and family. However, without proper guidance, these platforms can present various challenges for teens. Parents must take an active role in setting examples and monitoring their children’s online engagement, and we trust these expert recommendations will make navigating this landscape easier for both adults and their children.
About Children and Screens:
Children and Screens: Institute of Digital Media and Child Development is a 501C(3) national nonprofit organization founded by Dr. Pamela Hurst-Della Pietra. The organization focuses on advancing interdisciplinary research, enhancing expertise within the field, informing the public, and advocating for sound policy for child health and wellness.
For further details, visit https://www.childrenandscreens.com/
Editor’s Note: The insights shared in this article are derived from the expertise of Children and Screens and do not imply endorsement by GLF or its editorial personnel.
